11 Nov 2011

A black and white opinion

Lifelong fan Alex Thomson gives his impassioned reaction to the news that Newcastle Football club is planning to rename St James’ Park. 

Apologies.  Several people asked me to blog yesterday but it was all anger, red mist.  Today I have calmed a little.

No question, when news first reached northern Japan (where I currently find myself) about mucking about with St James’ Park’s name I went a tad Begby.

That bit in Trainspotting in his hotel room where he realises all his smack’s been ripped off? 

Well, I’ve needed some time. 

What strikes me from the rubble of my hotel room is that Mr Logo Revenue-Income (as I’ve renamed Mike Ashley in a flash of money-making genius) doesn’t appear to get how they’ve tried this nonsense before and it didn’t work then any more than it will now.

Seems like yesterday that they tried to kid the Toon Army into going along with renaming the Gallowgate End the Sir John Hall stand.  And look how fare that one went..

All this rubbish of course, just further proof that, in the words of Brian Robson, MUFC’s roving ambassador, secretly recorded in a recent C4 Dispatches:

“Football’s not a sport – it’s a business”

Which is why people in football (as opposed to football people) talk about “naming rights”, “maximising revenue streams” and, in the case of Newcastle United’s Derek Llambias, “sustainability”.

Yes, sustainability!  What, Derek, is sustainable about renaming St James’ Park that dominates the skyline of the football-crazy Toon?

What company will want their name and logo up there, risking the venom for said company and product of every Newcastle fan?

Try sustaining that.

Why not rename the Tyne while you’re at it – the Sunburst Water Experience?

Go national.  Stonehenge is a bit plodding. Step this way for the Ryanair-Rentokil Stone Arena?

It’s not as if we haven’t got used to the corrosive effects of turning sport into business.  It’s just that some hint of restraint would be welcome once in a while, some sense that we should occasionally just pretend football is a sport with community roots and heritage, not least in the north-east.

But no.  Everything’s a potential income stream.  Football is a product.  Fans are consumers.

If Mr Logo Revenue-Income had his way they’d try to franchise out the Blaydon Races – oh sorry, make that the Walmart-Suntory Rodeo.

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