Interview with Recruit 12 - Reanne
Category: Press Pack ArticleReanne
Recruit: 12
Age: 29
Profession: Personal trainer/coach
Hometown/Region: From Huddersfield but lives in Leeds
Background
Reanne grew up in Huddersfield, in an area where gang violence and drugs were rife.
As a child, she experienced abuse that she did not address or acknowledge until she was a teenager, when the memories started to come back to her in her dreams. During her time at high school, Reanne also struggled with accepting her sexuality, which she found herself hiding from others. Fitness and training have always been her true saviour, providing her with the mental strength to overcome her demons. Her biggest sporting achievement to date is playing rugby for Yorkshire RUFC in 2016 and 2017.
Tell me about your experience on SAS: Who Dares Wins?
Oh my goodness, the hardest and most testing experience of my life to date but definitely the most rewarding. I have never been pushed to that extreme and felt so much love and hate towards an experience that has helped me grow into a stronger version of myself.
Did you find it difficult? Was it more difficult than you expected?
I did find it difficult. It wasn’t easy at all and it was so much harder than I thought. Nothing can prepare you for the amount of mental and physical stress you go through on that show but I loved it. I wanted to quit over and over but I proved myself right on so many occasions - that I am stronger than I think.
You experienced a chemical warfare attack as part of the series. This is the first time this has happened on SAS: Who Dares Wins. How did you find that?
This was the most challenging task of all. The entire experience, running in the gas mask, and the feeling of the tear gas running through my body was absolutely awful BUT when I felt my body purge it out afterwards, I felt so elated and amazed that the body can do something like that. Wouldn’t do it again if you paid me though!
Have you ever done anything like this before?
No, I’d consider myself a very active person who tests my boundaries but nothing can compare to the tests within this series.
What made you sign up?
I noticed I was holding myself back in so many areas of my life and it was stemming from my mindset and past trauma. I hated the feeling and I wanted an opportunity to prove that I can control myself under extreme circumstances and endure anything. Also that my adversity doesn’t have to define me as a person. If anything, it makes me stronger.
What training did you do in preparation for this course?
Admittedly I didn’t do much specifically for the show. I love Crossfit, so I trained as I normally would do. On reflection,
I should have gone for some more weighted runs!
Now that you have this experience, would you like to join the real Special Forces?
A part of me would absolutely and there has always been a part of me that wants to serve for my country as I think I’d make an incredible recruit but my passions for coaching far outweigh the military I think.
What was the best part of the series for you?
It’s hard to pinpoint as there are a couple of moments, but the best parts for me were the chemical warfare exposure, backwards dive and the tactical no weapon challenge with an enemy. I felt like 24 years of aggression, anger and fear were released within those 30 seconds and it felt amazing!
What was the hardest part of the series for you?
The hardest part of the series in my opinion was the running with the bergen on our backs. I HATED those things and my little legs couldn’t hack it!
What is your biggest fear and has this experience helped you get over that fear?
My biggest fear is that I’ll never be loved, never be wanted romantically by someone because of my childhood trauma and this experience has certainly eradicated that for me. This experience helped me realise that this world can be very cruel but it doesn’t mean that you let the moments of adversity define you. If you harness your fears and commit to yourself, anything is possible. Without the adversity and without the challenges, we wouldn’t be as strong as we are both physically and mentally.
Do you think you found it harder than the male recruits?
I think some of them found it harder than I did. We had some very strong female recruits in my opinion. Especially no.7 (Lauren)!
You had to share all your space with men for the whole time you were there, including sleeping and toilets. How did you find that?
I didn’t mind that at all - I felt very comfortable, very quickly. We broke the ice as we were all in it together. When you suffer together there is a strange bond that breaks the ice really quickly.
Would you ever do it again?
Yes 100%. Sometimes I look back and say no but I know I absolutely would as I just love a challenge!
What do you think you’ve learnt about yourself?
I’ve learnt that I am capable of much more than I think. I doubt myself too much and need to stop doing that.
The course also made me realise that I need to learn how to relax and open up to others much sooner. I sometimes protect myself by being too serious and withdraw but there is no need to be like that all the time. I’ve learnt I am enough as I am. I’m a good person and I can thrive under pressure.
Has being on the series changed your life in anyway?
I’m no longer defined by my past, I’m creating a life that I want to live and I am working hard every day to be the change that I want to see in the world. I’ve learnt that I was holding myself back and I refuse to do that since being on the show. I regularly remind myself of what I achieved on the show whenever I slip back into old habits physically and mentally. The show in my eyes has become a blueprint for me to build a new foundation for myself. Stronger, more resilient, more robust and less fearful of a challenge and adversity. Coming onto the show was one of the best decisions I have ever made.