Pay attention please, class

26 October 2011

Oregon - the model student.

Good morning, students.

I'm sorry to have to play the bad guy here, but some of you clearly haven't been doing the required reading recently. (Not you, Oregon, obviously.)

The set texts have made it explicitly clear that Fresh Meat takes a break in week 44 because Top Boy is stripped across that week. Yet some of you have insisted on putting in your essays (or "Listings pages" as you insist on referring to them) that the series ends after episode 6 (tonight, Wednesday 26th October).

Just to clarify - and please write this down, class - tonight's show is episode 6. After it transmits, episode 7 will be made available on 4oD, two weeks before the show is on-air on Channel 4 on Wed 9 November. The final episode of the series, episode 8, goes out the following week, Wed 16 November.

If you could make this clear in all future essays, I might be able to start awarding some marks above the dismal 30 per cent level below which most of you seem content to coast. (Not you, Oregon, obviously).

Right, off you go. I want your next essay, "Why Channel 4 is the best TV station in the history of broadcast media" to be on my desk next Thursday. Please use up-to-date examples including Top Boy, Misfits, Derren Brown, Jamie's Great Britain and Mummifying Alan.

Thank you. Oregon, could you stay behind a moment...