Things have gone a bit wonkaloid

Hello.

You might be noticing some strange things going on here at the press website. Freaky stuff, like new tabs appearing on the menu above us, leading to absolutely nothing. (What the hell are Pre Listings anyway?)

Some of you will be experiencing an odd-looking layout on your screens, with a tab being pushed down to the next level (if you press Control and F5 together, it will get better). You might have seen stories appear and disappear. It could be that your keyboard has turned into a ripe camembert (if this happens, press the letter ‘q' 128 times and it'll return to normal). One man, in Oxfordshire, even reported that the 1980s boyband Bros had come out of his screen and stolen his garden hose, but this is unlikely to happen again.

Anyway, apologies for all of these computastic anomalies. The boffins responsible have been forced to strip to their pants and dance on the boardroom table while executives throw darts at their knees. The weirdly useless tab should be gone by Friday, and the weirdly useless website editor soon afterwards. (Hold on, that's me...)

Thanks for your patience.